In weaving my history, I am mending my heart. In looking back over my life, I am wanting to understand the basic make up of the family to which I have come from. In looking in, I can view my life from an entirely different perspective. Almost with a detachment, that allows me to fully participate in the lives that brought me thus far.
I was born to a mother and a father, of the 1940 era. Families that came up through the rough times, and the era of Vietnam, and the Peace Love and Happiness people, who felt that war was not the answer.
My mother a loving beautiful soul who was a free spirit, somewhat different from the family she came from. Her mother -Portuguese. Her dad, -Irish and Scottish. Two different worlds trying to meld together. Gram-ma Mary Mello, married Harry J. Sears. Even though I grew up knowing both of them, I realize today, that I don't fully know anyone. Growing up in that era, so much was based on very hard work, toiling away to make ends meet, and creating strong families, who stuck together no matter what. I wish I knew more about my gram-ma's side, but even till this day, they're are so many unanswered questions. It was as though, she had no family other then her husband, children and grandchildren, her family of origin was not the part of her we got to share in, or privy too. Gram-pa, Harry's family we know a little more about. Henry J Sears, married to Elizabeth McDowell and built a house in Fall River with his father, up on a hill in the Highlands of Fall River. They ran a florist and had a lawn care business. Great grand-pa was the head gardner to the infamous Lizzie Borden. This is the very house that gram-ma Mary and Gran-pa Harry lived there beginning years, and where my mother was residing when she met my dad.
Life for mom and dad did not start off the best either. During that time, being a free spirit to which mom was, and dad being a free spirit himself, what else could happen, but "me". I sure wished many times, that life for me was easier, but as I have uncovered their lives, I am finding mine. It is through my family who struggled in so many ways, that I am who I am today. Each road they traveled, is a road I myself have visited in my own personal way.
In uncovering the lineage, I am now able to listen and understand the beginnings and fully appreciate the hard work and toil my family has come up through. As I see the full lives they have lead, I am more aware of the value of each of them. There participation is life is the same as mine. Doing the best they knew how, with what they had. No excuses, just simple truths. My journey to myself is leading down the roads that will help bring my own family home. With a sincere heart I am reaching across time, to pull the truths, and the love, and expand my own horizons into the life we each live.
Today, I truly know how very blessed I am, to even exist, I come from native roots as well, Dads side Frank Fournier a Lineage that comes from Chesire England, Amelia Nannery. Pepe's distant relatives to Celine Dion, Modanna, Camilla, and Hillary Clinton. As well Pepe' Lionel Fournier's lineage is of native roots, that we are still discovering, from Canada. We are tracing as far back as we can, and hoping that this summer, we can have a reunion of sorts, to bring those of us together, to remember and honor our families.
My sister and I began this journey of discovery slowly after the loss of our mother, which took us about 26 years, to even speak about, together in the same room. So much grief has befallen many in our families, and tragedies are not uncommon in this world. Out of the darkness and grief of loss she and I, have come to love each other beyond words. We will walk together and collect our family back together, step by step.
Today, my spirit is full, with many thoughts and visions, I am feeling and sorting my way through, and writing this blog has been a huge tool in uncovering with words the process of our family. A family whom I love so much, and daily think of with as much love an anyone can have, at the same time, always knowing to each their own way...and in understanding this...I know I am on my way to healing the deep parts of myself. I am so very grateful to my family who have worked and toiled away and who have instilled love and sensitivity and caring to my life. I have many stories still to uncover and write about...all to follow...in love I end this note today. ♥♥♥
ListeningHeart Kim
I was born to a mother and a father, of the 1940 era. Families that came up through the rough times, and the era of Vietnam, and the Peace Love and Happiness people, who felt that war was not the answer.
My mother a loving beautiful soul who was a free spirit, somewhat different from the family she came from. Her mother -Portuguese. Her dad, -Irish and Scottish. Two different worlds trying to meld together. Gram-ma Mary Mello, married Harry J. Sears. Even though I grew up knowing both of them, I realize today, that I don't fully know anyone. Growing up in that era, so much was based on very hard work, toiling away to make ends meet, and creating strong families, who stuck together no matter what. I wish I knew more about my gram-ma's side, but even till this day, they're are so many unanswered questions. It was as though, she had no family other then her husband, children and grandchildren, her family of origin was not the part of her we got to share in, or privy too. Gram-pa, Harry's family we know a little more about. Henry J Sears, married to Elizabeth McDowell and built a house in Fall River with his father, up on a hill in the Highlands of Fall River. They ran a florist and had a lawn care business. Great grand-pa was the head gardner to the infamous Lizzie Borden. This is the very house that gram-ma Mary and Gran-pa Harry lived there beginning years, and where my mother was residing when she met my dad.
Life for mom and dad did not start off the best either. During that time, being a free spirit to which mom was, and dad being a free spirit himself, what else could happen, but "me". I sure wished many times, that life for me was easier, but as I have uncovered their lives, I am finding mine. It is through my family who struggled in so many ways, that I am who I am today. Each road they traveled, is a road I myself have visited in my own personal way.
In uncovering the lineage, I am now able to listen and understand the beginnings and fully appreciate the hard work and toil my family has come up through. As I see the full lives they have lead, I am more aware of the value of each of them. There participation is life is the same as mine. Doing the best they knew how, with what they had. No excuses, just simple truths. My journey to myself is leading down the roads that will help bring my own family home. With a sincere heart I am reaching across time, to pull the truths, and the love, and expand my own horizons into the life we each live.
Today, I truly know how very blessed I am, to even exist, I come from native roots as well, Dads side Frank Fournier a Lineage that comes from Chesire England, Amelia Nannery. Pepe's distant relatives to Celine Dion, Modanna, Camilla, and Hillary Clinton. As well Pepe' Lionel Fournier's lineage is of native roots, that we are still discovering, from Canada. We are tracing as far back as we can, and hoping that this summer, we can have a reunion of sorts, to bring those of us together, to remember and honor our families.
My sister and I began this journey of discovery slowly after the loss of our mother, which took us about 26 years, to even speak about, together in the same room. So much grief has befallen many in our families, and tragedies are not uncommon in this world. Out of the darkness and grief of loss she and I, have come to love each other beyond words. We will walk together and collect our family back together, step by step.
Today, my spirit is full, with many thoughts and visions, I am feeling and sorting my way through, and writing this blog has been a huge tool in uncovering with words the process of our family. A family whom I love so much, and daily think of with as much love an anyone can have, at the same time, always knowing to each their own way...and in understanding this...I know I am on my way to healing the deep parts of myself. I am so very grateful to my family who have worked and toiled away and who have instilled love and sensitivity and caring to my life. I have many stories still to uncover and write about...all to follow...in love I end this note today. ♥♥♥
ListeningHeart Kim
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